I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
accomplished twins. life is a go
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
