How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
