I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize