1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
I think I died a long time ago.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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