waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize