Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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