Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
