You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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