Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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