..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
