This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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