brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
