I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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