Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
