I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
