I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
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