I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
