Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
This toilet bowl is my home.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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