Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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