PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
