finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
