don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
he had hair everywhere except his balls
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
