There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Randomize
