Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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