I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
