I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
she told me i tasted like america
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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