ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
