I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
