Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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