real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
