well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
We are all done wearing pants today
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
