sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Randomize
