Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
