Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize