Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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