toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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