I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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