Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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