Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
