Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
