forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
