yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
