Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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