I don't remember. Are we still dating?
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Randomize
