I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
