Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
