I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
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