And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
