My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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