I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize